Clever Gretel
There was once a cook named Gretel. She wore shoes with red heels, and whenever she went out in them, she twirled around and around. Feeling ever so pleased, she would think:
“What a pretty girl you are!”
And when she came back home, she would have a sip of wine for joy; and since wine also sharpens the appetite, she would taste the very best of whatever she was cooking, until she was quite full:
“A cook must know what the food tastes like.”
It happened one day that the master of the house said to her:
—Gretel, tonight a guest is coming: prepare two fine partridges for me.
—Right away, sir.
So she prepared the partridges, cleaned them, skewered them on the spit, and as evening fell, put them over the fire to roast. The partridges began to turn golden and just right, but the guest still had not arrived.
—Sir, if the guest does not come, I’ll have to take the partridges off the fire; but it would be a shame and a sorrow if they were not eaten soon, while they are at their juiciest.
—Then I’ll go and fetch the guest myself.
Gretel moved the spit with the partridges aside:
“Standing there by the fire makes one sweat and grow thirsty; who knows when they’ll come! In the meantime, I’ll go down to the cellar and have a little sip.”
She ran downstairs, lifted a jug:
“God bless you, Gretel!”
and took a drink.
“Wine calls for wine, and one mustn’t stop halfway”
and she took another very proper drink.
Then she went back and put the partridges over the fire again, brushed them with butter, and turned the spit merrily.
But since the roast smelled so good, Gretel thought:
“Perhaps it needs just a touch more… I had better taste it!”
She licked her finger and said:
“Oh, how good these partridges are… It would be a sin and a shame not to eat them right now!”
She ran to the window to see whether the master was already coming with the guest, but she saw no one.
“One wing is going to burn; I’d better eat it myself.”
So she cut it off, ate it, and it tasted wonderful.
“The other must go too, or the master will notice something is missing.”
When she had gobbled up both wings, she looked out again to see the master, but she did not see him.
“Who knows! Perhaps they are not coming and have stopped somewhere.”
“Come now, Gretel, cheer up! Since you have begun: take another cool drink and finish it off. When it’s gone, you’ll be at peace. Why should God’s good gift go to waste?”
So she ran down to the cellar again, came back with the jug, took a drink as it should be taken, and ate the whole partridge, happy as could be.
When the partridge had vanished and the master still had not arrived, Gretel looked at the other one and said:
“Where one is, the other must be too. What is fair for one is fair for the other. I think if I take another drink, it won’t do me any harm.”
She took another generous drink and let the second partridge follow the path of the first.
While she was right in the middle of her feast, the master appeared:
—Hurry up, Gretel, the guest will be here any moment.
—Yes, sir, I’ll prepare it right away
Then the master checked whether the table was properly set; he took the great knife with which he was going to carve the partridges and began to sharpen it in the hallway.
Just then the guest arrived and politely knocked at the door of the house.
Gretel ran to see who it was and, when she saw the guest, put a finger to her lips and said:
—Shhh! Do you hear that?
The sound of the sharpening knife came softly through.
Go quickly, go back the way you came; if my master catches you, you are done for. Yes, he invited you to dinner… but the only thing in his head is cutting off both your ears.
—Cut off my ears?! Absolutely not!
The guest ran down the stairs as fast as he could.
Gretel did not stay still: she ran shouting to the master:
—What a guest you have brought me!
—Good heavens, Gretel! Why? What do you mean?
—Well, yes. That man snatched the two partridges from the platter just as I was about to bring them to the table, and ran off with them.
—What manners! If only he had left me one, so I would have had something to eat!
Then the master ran after him, still holding the knife in his hand:
—Just one! Just one!
—Not one, not any! My two ears are coming with me!
And the guest ran as if he had fire beneath his feet, so he could take both of them safely home.
Not everyone ate partridges, but in the end, the guest managed to save both his ears.
And that is all… for the moment.
Til the next tale.